In spite of what we heard in our 20's about all the "beatniks" and communal living, mostly in California, we have been inducted into that society! We do not wear peace symbols, scarves around our heads, nor do we pass flowers. We are not referred to as the "flower children of the 60's". We belong to a group of compassionate people who are trying to find solace through communal living, called Caring House.
Each of the families here are provided their own private space within the confines of their rooms. We do, however come together for all our meals, and any of the many activities afforded us by the army of volunteers. Last evening Lee enjoyed gathering in the central communal (living) area to watch the world series with some of the friends we have made here. I was tired after contributing to the large pot-luck dinner for preparation and clean-up so I decided to watch the game from my bed while resting. We have become a family.........a family of complete strangers who share their stories of circumstances involving families, sickness, recovery, etc. We share food together that has been prepared each Wednesday by those of us residing here. Most of the other days, food is contributed by volunteers, restaurants, or well-meaning businesses. Our new friendships provide outlets for stress by sharing our stories that are more often than not punctuated with laughter, not tears. I once read that it is only when you accept your own mortality that you can truly begin to live! That is what we witness here! That acceptance brings joy each day for the new day, regardless of the weather. We are greeted by others who pronounce each day as GOOD!
During the course of a day, we meet newcomers and we sadly say good-bye to those who have completed their course of treatment. Along with the good-byes there are promises of meeting again, somewhere along the way. There are those whom we know we will never see again because of the advanced condition of their cancer. These are the ones with metastatic brain tumors. They are the very brave ones....always smiling, chin up and moving along to the next session of treatment. There are also the ones we see who appear to have conquered the madness of cancer and show daily improvement. Some are optimistic that it is completely gone when they return from the body scans that follow the long journey.
Yesterday we met Oliver. He has been fighting squamous cell carcinoma for the past ten years. He is a retired military person who worked with nuclear submarines. To Date he has had over twenty squamous cell carcinomas on his face, head and ears. The entire left side of his face is disfigured from all the surgery and radiation. His left eye had to be removed and replaced with a graft. The left side of his face is now paralyzed from the removal of his facial nerve. His tongue is partially paralyzed and he has great difficulty communicating. He is not an old man. He is in his early to mid sixties. He does not complain, and his wife helps him communicate with others. Another example as one of those who are fortunate to be here at the Caring House.
Lee has reached the level in his radiation therapy that leaves him extremely fatigued. He goes to bed after lunch each day and sleeps for at least two hours. He feels much better when he awakes and is able to go longer at night. He is especially tired today because he stayed up until midnight after watching the world series. So far, his heart is cooperating with the medication and we are looking forward to his appointment with the lung transplant doctor early Monday to discuss the plan of action to keep the transplanted lung from going into rejection.
From time to time I tease Lee by telling him he is the world's only walking encyclopedia of diseases and therapy. He is also the world's most determined and ambitious man in conquering all the ravages of disease that have attacked his body.
We are looking forward to Tomorrow......Friday. A short week-end, but will be good to be at home.
More Later...............................................Brenda
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